New venue for delicate questions of family purity

North Woodmere woman heads Yoetzet Halacha program

By Malka Eisenberg

Issue of Oct. 10, 2008

When they are faced with personal questions concerning Jewish family law, many observant women turn to a knowledgeable rabbi for a solution. Some women are uncomfortable broaching intimate issues with a rav, however. They tend to decide such matters for themselves, taking either an approach more stringent than necessary or perhaps one that is more lax than halacha might require.

In an effort to bridge this gap, some rabbis and communities in Israel, and now in North America, have hired yoatzot halacha, women trained in Jewish family law and women’s health, to educate, advise and consult with women about such questions. Queries are held in strict confidence and the yoatzot turn to a qualified rabbi when a halachic ruling is required.

Naomi Maryles, a resident of North Woodmere, is the director of Nishmat’s Miriam Glaubach Center, the North American division of American Friends of Nishmat, which places Yoatzot Halacha in North American communities.

“They reach out to women who want to observe the laws but are overly strict [on themselves] because they are embarrassed to call and ask,” Maryles explained.

If a woman were to ask her husband to bring the question to a rav, the rav might not get the full story. Additionally, the woman is not present to respond to clarifying questions the rav might wish to ask.

The primary focus of a yoetzet halacha is guidance and education, Maryles said. They “don’t paskin [issue halachic rulings],” she stressed. “They help women navigate through the laws of Taharat HaMishpacha. Anyone who is an expert, things are black and white, you know the answers. [A halachic ruling is required] when it’s a gray issue. In those situations they can’t paskin; they are not rabbeim, they go to a rav.”

A hotline number operated by Nishmat allows “back and forth conversation, so the yoetzet can see the full picture... I myself used the hotline and it is extremely helpful,” Maryles said.

The coursework takes two years –– over 1,000 hours of intense study with rabbis in Taharat HaMishpacha, Jewish family law, and training from experts in physiology, gynecology, infertility, psychology, women’s health and sexuality. Women who enter the program at the Keren Ariel Women’s Halachic Institute of Nishmat are carefully chosen for their religious dedication, depth of Torah knowledge and leadership skills.

Over 50 yoatzot halacha currently serve Jewish communities in Israel and North America. Since the first women were graduated from the program in 2000, they have helped thousands of women find solutions to problems and improve their observance of Taharat HaMishpacha.

There are currently three yoatzot halacha in the United States and one in Canada. One, Atara Eis, lives in Philadelphia. A graduate of Stern College, she completed a graduate program in advanced Talmudic Studies for women and an MS in Jewish education from Azrieli graduate school at Yeshiva University before becoming a yoetzet halacha through Nishmat. She is on staff at various congregations in Manhattan, including Congregation Kehilath Jeshurun.

The program “was offered to us by Nishmat,” said Rabbi Haskel Lookstein, rav of Kehilath Jeshurun.  “To have someone directly affiliated with our congregation is a tremendous asset to the community. A good yoetzet knows the subject much better than a normal rav. The community is very pleased with this development and I’m sure she’ll get many questions I won’t even know about.”

In the Five Towns this week, mikveh-going women offered a wide range of opinions regarding the yoetzet program.

“I think that women would not ask a question [to a rav] at all,” one woman said. Another, ‘Sara,’ believes the innovation of a yoetzet halacha “reflects a lacking in the relationship between women and rabbis. It’s a tradition for generations to consult a rabbi.”

“The problem,” stressed ‘Rivka,’ “is a lot of rabbeim are not well versed in certain questions and won’t say they don’t know and say that it’s assur [forbidden]. These women know a lot more than some rabbis. The women are very knowledgeable.”

“On fertility issues,” said another woman, “a lot of rabbis have no clue and say something is assur.”

The yoatzot in the United States run educational programs and are available to serve as scholars in residence in communities, presenting programs on women’s health, Jewish family law and other topics.

Nishmat’s Halachic Hotline is toll free in the US and Canada: 877-YOETZET (877-963-8938). The number in Israel is 02-640-4343. The hours are on Israel time: 6 p.m. to midnight Sunday through Thursday, Friday 8 a.m. to noon, Saturday night a half hour after Shabbat until midnight. The website is www.nishmat.net.